Tag Archives: Love & Relationships


1. Does he construct you smile?

Sometimes it really is that simple. When you think about him, when you watch him, when he turns his face to yours and grins, does that make you smile instantaneously, effortlessly? When youve had a long day and it ends with plans to see him, do you feel the corners of your mouth turn up unconsciously? Does it attain you happy, just knowing that hes a part of their own lives?

2. Does he treat you well?

You know a gentleman when you assure one. And you know a gentleman even better when you encounter him, and he treats you with love and kindness. A good guy will open doors for you, will consider your impressions, will always ask if youre feeling okay, if youre happy, if theres anything he can do. Especially in the early stages of dating, he will do anything in his power to stimulate you feel comfortable and to show that hes worthy of your attention. An immature boy will try to seduce you, try to coerce you into doing something you might not be ready for, or play games with you , not texting you back right away, feigning disinterest, etc. A real man, the man you should definitely give a chance, is the one who treats you with respect, right from day one.

3. Does he listen to you?

This is little, yet huge. When you speak, does this guy look into your eyes and actually pay attention? Or is he looking around, looking at other women, looking at his phone? The guy thats worth your time is the one that goes to show youre worth his. Hes the one focusing on you, recollecting what you say, get invested, early on, in the tiny details of your life. A human that listens is a man that cares, remember that.

4. Does he stimulate you laugh?

You should always devote a chance to the man that attains you laugh. This man knows that your best self is your happy ego, and will do what he can to get you to throw back your head and let it out. Hes the man that takes time to discover your sense of humour, then builds gags around that. He wants you to enjoy yourself, and if youre laughing and enjoying yourself, then why wouldnt you want to keep doing that with this guy by your side?

5. Does he stimulate you feel like yourself?

Can you be fresh from a workout, hair in a sloppy ponytail, body slicked with sweat and still feel special to him? Can you roll out of bed, still in your baggy t-shirt and slippers and be comfortable answering the door to him? Can you belly-laugh at all the things that attain you laugh or be silly and dance around your living room when hes around? Does he construct you feel totally comfy in your own scalp, like you dont have to change a damn thing? Then hes definitely a guy that’s worth your time.

6. Does he induce you feel things youve never felt?

This one might be hard to admit at first. You fight it, because its scary. Because youre not quite sure about letting him get too close. But you know youre lying to yourself. Because he makes you feel dizzy where reference is touches you, or induces your heart skip when you see a text from him on your phone. You find yourself was intended to spend time with him, to get to know him, to get closer to each other. Closer than anyone else has. He constructs you feel strange, feel wonderful, feel different. And you, my darling, need to stop worrying and go for it.

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The ground has fallen beneath me. I am in air. I cant move. I cant exhale. You took your things. The shirts I slept in. But the latter are mine too. You were mine too .

Cordial at first. We will work on ourselves. How can we love each other without loving ourselves? I believe you will come back. I truly do.

Your friends are here. They tell you to stop. Let run. Dont call him. He doesnt care that you want to construct things work. He doesnt care you had a life growing inside of you. He doesnt care .

I call you too much. You take too long to respond to my texts. Im not used to you treating me this route. Why are you treating me this way?

I was only trying to love you.

Its been a few months, I call less. I exclaim more. I try to think about my summertime trip. I try to think of my family. I try to think of grad school. Trying doesnt run. I think of you.

July. I see you. We talk. I weep. You walk away. My last image of you is you walking away .

Im on my trip-up, so I merely exclaimed once. I meet person. He isnt you.

Type out a text, want to press send, erase it, throw my phone across the room, screaming into my pillow .

I start school. Things “re a bit” exciting. So exciting I want to share it with you. I forgot I cant call you. I nearly do.

I meet someone new. He isnt you.

I feel great. Alive. Read my favorite volume again. Go to the gym. Be with my family. Life is beautiful.

Dial your number, let it ring once, hang up, hope you call back, you dont.

I feel more energetic than ever, I workout consistently, get a 4.0, spend time with the person or persons I care most about. I feel amazing.

Its 3AM. You call. I dont answer. You text. I stare at that text for what felt like years. I dont know what to respond. So I dont .

I cry again. Why did he call? What did he want? Does he think he can have me just like that? Perhaps he can. No. He cant. He never will.

I maintain crying. I set myself back together though. Its been almost a year. I should be fine by now. I put my pieces back together.

Something is still missing. A piece. You.

Please make up your mind. Think. Do you still think of me? Is your heart still with me? Time is an enemy. Time is no good. Do not take your time. Im almost gone.

Gone .

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1. Leaving the house appearing especially hot right after a fight merely to underscore how much her significant other has to lose if he doesnt clean up his act and apologize stat.

2. Holding a strangers gaze for longer than usual, hoping to distract him with believes of her naked body until he trips or fallsotherwise known as eye fucking.

3. Wearing her flirtiest skirt or dress to impressa guy sheknows shes going torun intoatsome phase during the school day or at work.

4. Dressing super sexy on a altogether random morning specifically because she feels like being elevator-eyed and/ or catcalled.

5. Smiling coquettishly when she catches a dude checking her out, as if to say maybe.

6. Winking and/ or smirking suggestively at amanwho catches her checking out, even if she has no intentionof approaching him or taking thingsanyfurther.

7. Claiming shes totally okay with her boyfriend going to strip clubs while conversingwith another manjust to seem chiller than she actually is.( Meanwhile, shes get her boyfriendon such a tight leash back home, he knows ifhe’scaught’ motorboating’ a stripper shell leave his ass in a heartbeat .)

8. Promoting a manto vent about his wife or girlfriend and validating every single one of his grievances along the way, subtly encouraginghim to wonderwhy hes not with her instead.

9. Letting a guy she interacts with ever so briefly on the bus or in an elevator believe that hes got a shot for a fewprecioussecondsbefore get the hell out of there with her day.

10. Devoting her contact information out to a random guy who hits on her, even if she never intends on textinghim back, only to see if hell reach out.

11. Bending over at merely the right moment, fully aware that some dudes hoping to get a glimpse of her ass.

12. Leaning forward at merely the right moment, fully aware that some dudes thirstingto grope her breasts and that the glimpseof alittle boob flesh willget him rock hard.

13. Pretending to be dumb to the fact that her teats are hard AF and pointing right through her top.

14. Telling a male colleague or classmate about a particularly sexy dreaming she had the night before just to remind him that shes a naughty little forest nymph deep down.

15. Prancing rather than walking.

16. Taking style longer thanusualto set her hair up into a ponytail because she knows she has an audience. She can feelsome guyundressing her with his eyes as she maneuversand she likes it.

17. Get in touch with an ex simply to say hi or hey there because she could use the ego boost that comes with impression wanted by more than one mansimultaneously.

18. Telling a male friend an especially dirty joke, realizing that the punchlinemight just give him an erection.

19. Making a not-so-innocent remark about balls or nuts that’s distinctlydesignedtoprovoke aguywho’snot her boyfriend.

20. Running out of her route to compliment a guy she knows or encounters regularly on his new haircut or new shirt simply to prove shes paying attention.

21. Stretching post workout immediately in a male onlooker’sline of sight, as if shes a former dancer whos very dedicated to her flexible or something.

22. Taking her shirt off mid workout instead of starting off in simply a athletics bra so she can put one over a little strip show at the gym for anyonewatching.

23. Booty shorts.

24. Chuckling her face off at something thats not at all funny because persuading amanthat he’shilariousis the most effective route to flirt, obviously.

25. Worse yet,.

26. Making physical contact with another guywhen it’s totally unnecessarythat surprisingly tenderpush or jostle specifically designed to amplify feigned exasperation or overstated amusement.

27. Offering to rub another mans shoulders or his back instinctively when he complains about being a little sore.

28. Announcing that she has a boyfriend and then flirting like crazy anyway, as if advertising what a carefree, do-what-she-wants kind of dame she is but also that she’s hot enough to be taken already so thenew dude will have to work for it.

29. Addressing a human by his name unexpectedly( e.g.” Hey, Doug” instead of just “Hey” ), which breeds a strangely powerful sense of intimacy.

30. Addressing a manby his full name instead of the moniker he goes by( e.g.” Hello, Douglas “), which is secretly one of the most subtle but impactful ways to flirt.

31. Licking her lips more sensually than necessary when feeing something sticky because she knows she’s being watched by a random guy.

32. Devouring a popsicle in publicin such a waythat any man who notices will automatically imagine her dedicating thema blowjob.

33. Asking another man what he thinks about porn or some racy movie under the guise of actually caring about his opinion when all she wants is to arouse him a little justfor kicks.

34. Sending textsto a guy the hell is laced with moreemojis than she typically employs when communicating with her besties.

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No, thankyou.

Yeah, Isaidit, andIllexplain.

Iamuninterestedincasual sexwith you . No, thankyou. There isno appeal to the fingernail biting waitforatextmessage( since we all know a phone call isoff the table) after you sleep with me. Thereisnothingdeliciousabout hoping that you give a shit orhaving to playit cool because I give a shit . Iwanttogoondates.Yes, dates not “hang outs.” That distinction isimportant because a hang outcouldmeanthatweregoing to go walkaround a mall like we did at 14 when our moms wereouronlymeansoftransportation. Ahang out impliesthat were bros. I have enough friends, sir.No, thankyou.

When you sayyou want to take me on a date, I know youre taking it seriouslyandthatImnot going out with some 19 -year-old kid.( Which wasnt appealing even when I was1 9.) Iwantyoutoaskme out a few daysbefore and scheme something. I want you to put someeffortintodatingme. I dont need flowersbut, goddamnit, some sign that you carewould be nice.

After that date, call.Itsnotthathard.Itsrefreshing . The two daywaiting period should be a myth.Unfortunatelyitsnot, butthinkabout how sillyit is. Oh mygod, that female wasamazing and I definitelywanttoseeher again but instead of merely attaining it happen Im going to attain her sit aroundandwonderifIlike herornot.Following through shouldnt be a rarity.

Iwantyoutobehonest.Woah, scary. I know. Heresthe thing, we are both adults. I dont need youtotellmewhatyouthinkI want to hear.

No, thankyou. I can call mymom and have her tell meImprettyifIreallyneed to hearit. The notion that you feel like you need to tell me you somethingyoudont believe, just soyou can get in mypants, isridiculous. If I want to sleep with you, I will. Itstotallythatsimple.

Idont need to hearsome long jogging speech about how unbelievable you thinkIamwhen, inreality, youre just trying to bust a nut . I would rather know up front what youreinterestedin.Ifwe go out and you dont want to see me again( brace yourself cuzthisis hardtounderstand ): donttell me thatyou do. Believe it ornot, girls dont want to be lied to. Imnotgoingtotellyousome fairytale storyabout how wonderful you are if I dont thinkit. PleasedontfreakoutifI want to talkto you. I like you. Stop panicking .( If you dont like me back: seeabove .) Itsokayif we talk. Itsokayif you want to talkto me or want to see me again. Dontwaituntilitstoolate to decide you want me.

I wasseeing thisguyfor a while a couple yearsbackandwedidthe whole playing it cooland casual sex thing off and on for almost a year .( Well, hedid .) Ihad no issue being like HI I LIKEYOU I HOPE THATS OKAY. I knew he likedmeback.Honestly, “were in” a good match but he waited until he moved 3,000 milesaway toadmittohavingfeelingsforme.

Whatseven more alarming isthat even though weve had thediscussionaboutwhere we both stand, hesstill timid. Hesstill weird about being anything otherthanbro-yaboutit.The last time I find himwe went on thissweet date and the next day hewassouncomfortablewith me. Why? Who givesa shit? Can person please explain what issoscaryorshamefulabout having feelingsand being willing to expressthem?

I dont need to have4 5minutedailydiscussion about the fuzzywuzzies, but I shouldnt be afraid to terrifyyou if I haveanemotionotherthan horniness.

I wont tell anyone if itssomething youre embarrassed about, butyouarecapable of having feelingsarent you?

Ingeneral, itseemslikethere isan unwillingnessformen to be humen. Im not talking about when youguystakeusoutand open doors. Thatssweet and all, but thatsnot it.

Im talking about the unwillingnesstoconnect, to be vulnerable, to step up. I amflabbergasted byhow few humen will takeresponsibilityfortheiremotional choicesand forthe damage theyleave behind post relationship.

Pleasedontget me wrong, girls arent innocent of dating crimes . There are womenwhowillbail, ghost, utilize, cheat, manipulate, lie people tend to suckin general but obviouslyitsnoteveryone. Imaware that there are men in the great broad somewhere who dont act like imbeciles. Otherwise, the human race wouldve objective centuries ago.

So, heresmyrequest: surprise me. Surprise the girl youre dating. Be real. Feign like there aretvcameraswaitingwith bated breath foryouremotional integrity. Share like theresa million dollarcommercialdealwaiting at the end of the season. It might workout for you.

Sincerely, ABitchWhoSeriouslyAint Got No Time ForThat

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Tis the season for making resolutions to be our best egoes. Committing to the gym , not smoking, feeing healthier, all that fun stuff.

A new year is the perfect time to try and start anew. For most this entails transgressing through roadblocks within ourselves that may be preventing its from getting what we want. And what most women want is a caring, healthy relationship( men do too for the most part, but not quite at the same level .)

Here are five tips-off to construct 2016 the year you get the love youve always wanted 😛 TAGEND

1. Figure out what it is you actually want and keep your eye on the prize.

Heres an issue I insure most women grappling with. They say they want to get married, or be in a committed relationship, but then they get caught up in situations that wont get them where they want to be( friends with benefits situations, dating a guy who has zero long term potential ).

I call these distractions meantime relationships. You tell yourself that it wont go anywhere, its not a real relationship, its just for the meantime. There are many problems with these situations, most notably is that it never ends up being so simple. When you get involved with person, impressions are inevitably going to come up. And while youre so caught up in your meantime situation, you are not able to notice other promising suitors that come your way.

Relationships take a lot of energy and they can be downright draining at times. Whats the point in expending this energy on the incorrect things? If you scheduled an appointment with the most amazing, sought-after personal trainer in the world you wouldnt run on the treadmill for an hour beforehand. This would deplete you and you wouldnt be focused on the workout with the trainer, a workout which will actually get you where you want to be.

2. Ditch the guy who wont commit.

Did you know that more breakups happen in January than any other hour of the year? There are several reasons for this. Some say its because people want to wait until after the holidays, other posit that the stress of the holidays define the demise in motion, and the theory I ascribe to is that people re-assess their situations and, emboldened by their resolution to construct the next year a great one, they come to their senses and dump the guy who isnt committing in the way theyd like.

If youre relationship seems to be going nowhere, your guy wont call you his girlfriend, he wont say I love you, wont introduce you to his friends or family, or he just delays and stimulates excuses when it is necessary to taking the next step in the relationshipthen you need to think long and hard if this is the kind of relationship you want to be in.

You deserve to be with a guy who wants to be with you just as much( if not more !) as you want to be with him. These relationships where the woman waits around for the guy to step up and perpetrate usually objective in sorrow and an empty carton of Ben& Jerrys. Make 2016 the year that you prioritize yourself when it comes to relationships and realise you deserve to have the relationship you want.

3. Look your best.

Okay, this is an obvious one, but still important and worth debate. Men are visual animals, this is just a fact. As such, they respond to aesthetics. Looking your best isnt just about appealing to humen, it will also make you feel better. Im sure youve noticed that when youre wearing an outfit you love and your makeup looks great and your hair “re coming out” perfect, you just feel unstoppable. You stand a little taller, have more of a spring in your step, and you walk down the street knowing youre a sight to behold!

Losing weight is by far the most popular new years solving and gym memberships usually skyrocket in January.only to plummet back up again come February. Working out has an array of benefits. Yes, theres losing weight and toning up, but youll also be healthier and happier. Try to figure out a workout regimen thats realistic, but still effective. Adopting healthy eating habits has literally transformed my life and changed my appearance( I get comments on my scalp everywhere I run !) so try to add more healthy foods to your diet and avoid anything that comes our of a package or a box.

I know were all feeling the pinch from holiday gift devoting, but why not indulge in a few cosmetics that will enhance your finest features? Maybe a new mascara to bring out your eyes or a bold lip color to play up your sulk. And the most important point regulation when it comes to looking your best is feeling comfy in what you have on. If “youre feeling” stupid, itll display! Wear clothes that flatter your figure and makeup that enhances your natural beauty.

4. Identify your issues and fix them.

Each one of us comes with luggage, some more than others. We all have issues that may be holding us back from becoming who we want to be and getting what we want out of life.

Maybe your parents had a messy divorce and you have trouble trusting humen, perhaps you were taunted as a kid and lack confidence, perhaps your first love cheated on you and violate your heart. Dont let your past enslave you. Take control of your life and work through anything that darkened your past so you can enjoy a brighter future.

Whatever it is thats attaining it tough for you to get the relationship you want, try to identify it and fix it. For some people it will mean going to therapy. Others might want to hire a dating coach. Or perhaps you only need to read a few good self-help books on the subject.

5. Choose to be happy.

Happiness doesnt just happen, its a option you make and its something you have to work on every day. Its far too easy to get caught up in everything thats incorrect in your life and it takes a bit of practice to develop yourself to look at whats going right.

The problem with negative thoughts is they never come one at a time. The minute you start focusing on one thing thats going wrong, all youll see is a life contained within crap. And if youre one of the many women who guesses shell be happy as soon as shes in a relationshipstop!

Relationships do not lead to happiness and being single does not equal a life of suffering. Relationships can definitely enhance your overall feelings of happiness, but they can never fill a void for you. Happiness always comes from within.

Put your focus on activities that make you happy rather than on receiving a relationship. Living a balanced life will stimulate you a more desirable person and youll be more likely to meet someone special.

This post originally appeared at A New Mode .

Want more writing like this? Read” 10 Things Every Woman Needs To Know About Men” on iBooks here.

10 Things Every Woman Needs To Know About Men is an honest , non-sugarcoated guide to understanding men and cracking their code so you can finally have the love you’ve always wanted.

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